There are a lot of guides out there that help you decide on the perfect loadout when it comes to the
combat aspects of Team Fortress 2 but let’s be honest, there aren’t enough guides on the core gameplay
of this hat simulator with shooting components. Coming into the game as a new player, it can be
overwhelming when trying to decide what to dress your merc up in and you might make some decisions
you may come to regret (looking at you lime green scouts). Listed here are my personal favorite outfits
for each mercenary and why I chose them. This is obviously not a conclusive list of the only good
cosmetics, but it may hopefully help you decide on your own direction when it comes to Fashion
Fortress 2. Note that some of the screenshots include items that I have renamed, please refer to the list
after each entry for the item names and a links to more information about them.
The Scout is an egotistical, narcissistic, man-child and I felt it was important that his style reflect that. It
took a long time to get to this particular loadout but I’m now certain that this is where it will stay. The
Punk’s Pomp is the main piece of this set, the quaffed hair, patched nose, and cigarette just screaming
80’s greaser. The Airborne Attire’s open jacket and rolled sleeves match this style as well, with the
Blizzard Britches finishing off the look. The main idea was to evoke that greaser look as best as possible
while still keeping it unique to the Scout.
The Soldier was a bit tricky to nail down a style for, with many of my early loadouts more along the lines
of secret service. The Soldier is a bit more of a nutjob though and so his style is a bit odder. The War Pig
is a classic item and, combined with his Exquisite Rack, makes him feel a lot more like a soldier behind
enemy lines who’s gone a bit native. The Dead of Night ties this together, serving as a military coat.
It wouldn’t be new information to say that the Pyro is a bit crazy and obsessed with fire and it’s not hard
to see why these items are perfect for it. The Burning Beanie is a genuinely cool looking hat while also
making the Pyro a literal hot head. The Hot Case, while apparently a reference to Carmen Sandiego,
always gave me a firefighter feel, despite the obvious irony that brings. Finally, the Pyromancer’s Mask
just looks freaky enough, and more so the longer you look, that it gives the set the feeling of a corrupted
fireman, maybe a villain out of Fire Force.
I’ll be honest, the Demoman was the hardest loadout for me to come to a decision on and it will no
doubt change as more cosmetics come out. I’m largely underwhelmed by most of his cosmetics but I
feel that at least a few come together in this case. The Tavish DeGroot Experience and Bearded
Bombardier together give off the air of an old, wandering hero, out to blow things up in the name of
justice. I’ve once again used the Dead of Night as a good way to round off the set, which I find it does
nicely in many situations.
If you haven’t noticed from the screenshot already, this is my Saxton Hale loadout. Despite not being
Australian, Heavy has the best build to be a genuine imitation of the big man himself. Since there aren’t
enough of the right items to really get an exact replica of Hale, this set is supposed to evoke him instead.
The Soviet Gentleman and, again, Airborne Attire, together give off a felling of a hunter, with The Mann
of the House being a nice item to finish off the look.
Unlike the rest of the mercenaries, the Engineer is most well known for his intellect, possibly only rivaled
by the next class. Leaning into this, the set I chose emphasizes the older, wiser, professorial vibe he has.
The Professor’s Peculiarity and The Dictator, give him the facial hair and glasses of a refined gentleman
of learning and, yet again, The Dead of Night makes another return, here looking like the refined coat of
the upper class of academia.
We reach my favorite class, and therefore my main class, the Medic. If there’s one thing this set is
supposed to be, it’s simple. I chose every item in this loadout because they were small, subtle, and
barely noticeable in the middle of a fight. The Mustachioed Mann gives a little more character to his
face, the Dr. Whoa adds a little class, and the Couvre Corner is just a really nicely designed item. When
you’re the biggest target on the team, it’s better to dress like the best.
The Sniper is a self-proclaimed professional, and as a fellow Australian, I can confirm that his attitude is
definitely more professional than a majority of the country (including the swearing). While his attire
here is certainly not fit for the outback, I wanted him to have a simple elegance. The Brim-Full of Bullets
is a nice hat with an adornment of spare ammo, the Dead of Night on the sniper looks like a
comfortable, long sleeved jacket, and The Dictator finishes it off with yet more classy facial hair.
The Spy has a distinctly debonair quality even in his default outfit and so everything I added was to
emphasize this. The Hat of Cards is one of many fedoras that the Spy can own but I chose this one due
to the irony that the hand of cards in the hat is considered to be the worst one possible. The Dead of
Night makes its final appearance as another classy jacket for only the classiest of classes, and the Sneaky
Spats of Sneaking are yet another smaller, subtler items that finish off the outfit nicely.
Scout
Soldier
Pyro
Demoman
Heavy
Engineer
Medic
Sniper
Spy
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